Luckily for you this type of thing is exactly why I'm here!
I have loads of basic translators in the back if you want one, but I highly recommend this HANDI-PC PDA with XENOVOX TRANSLATION ATTACHMENT instead.
Well what's the difference? Wait... you're just trying to get me to buy a more expensive model!
Paranoid aren't we? Maybe you would get along with Fibbian after all.